it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
There were 4 naked women demanding my presence. Of COURSE I got into the pool.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I DESERVE A BEADED TATTOOED MAN I'VE WANTED ONE FOR SO LONG
BEARDED TATTOOED MEN ARE PEOPLE AND NOT THINGS TO BE GIVEN FREELY
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
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