Im at strip club and am horny
she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
First lesson of the year: don't close the bar on mondays
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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