no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
I just had a Brazilian done for this guy. He's getting first-date sex whether he wants it or not.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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