Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
GET THE DICK OUT OF YOUR MOUTH AND CHECK FACEBOOK.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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