just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
O no, u 2 are dating again?
No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
What happened to fro yo and sex?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
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