Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize