I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
I'm just the girl with the breathalyzer keychain, and I embrace that.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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