..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Nah the bridesmaids all had dates. I slept with the next best thing: girl who WANTED to be a bridesmaid but didnt make the cut.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
Randomize
