If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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