you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
thanks 4 putting "im not your boyfriend baby" on my sex playlist. she just got pissed and left.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
When I die, I want you to spread my ashes at a Cracker Barrel.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
Randomize
