I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
Annabeth just got on the bar and slurred something about how she was worried that when she started dating you your penis wouldnt fit. You are one lucky bastard my friend.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
