she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
according to the woman who took my blood today, i have "party veins"
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
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