Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
