This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Wierdest expirience of my life this girl literally just knocked on my door at 140am to blow me in the shower. Idk what im doing but im doing it right
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
How many of my Tinder dates can my Christian roommate accidentally meet in the hallway at 3am before she's horrified and moves out?
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
