We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
the only good thing about breaking up with him while naked was that i got to make a forgetting sarah marshall reference
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
It was like the icing on a beautiful fuck boy cake.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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