No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
this is two weekends in a row I've been the pantsless girl at the party. I love my social life.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Dear female. Happy valentines day. If you have not had the pleasure of making love to me, please do not fret, I will get around to it soon enough. If you indeed have made love to me, then bravo, wasn't that grand! Perhaps we should do it again? Regardless, have a good day. This has been a public service announcement. Rock on.
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize