I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I lost all of my bathing suit tops.. This is both a success and a failure
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize
