I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
