thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
I just found an entire bag of French fries under the seat of my car labeled "For emergency use only" drunk me is always planning ahead.
Randomize
