hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
God, you're like boner-b-gone
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
