The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
her facebook's as public as her vagina
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
i swear, as soon as they invent a cure for herpes, he's mine.
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
I just puked on the sidewalk. At 11am. Thought you'd like to know.
Just found out I lit my hair on fire last night.
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