Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
no need to worry, I have the internet and a cape, I can accomplish anything. nothing can go wrong, I am unstoppable. Yo.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
As much as I enjoyed playing drunk half naked twister and talking about my daddy issues last time, I'll have to pass.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
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