Apparently you make a good broom.
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Can we just cry and dive into a couch-sized bag of sadness-chips, dip them in a la-z-boy sized jar of depression salsa while watching a show called 'Forget Your Hopes and Dreams, Just Kill Yourself'?
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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