all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
At least they aren't charging us for the broken diving board...
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
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