how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
I've slipped into the part of my life where I am not having sex to get Phils tickets from this chick. I need to seriously rethink my life decisions
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
