Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
