Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
Randomize
