super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I just remember getting him back by licking the window on his truck.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
