can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
Well. I have your keys. You have my car. Looks like we have a drunkxican standoff.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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