She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
Randomize