I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Don't try to sleep with work colleagues because he won't be able to get it up and you won't be able to look him in the eye ever again
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize