He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Randomize
