Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Last night this creepy guy asked me my name and I told him it was Jaundice and he called me that all night
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
