that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
The whole time we were hanging out my vagina was yelling at me like its a real live penis that wants to have sex with us what are you doing
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
sigh, if only his dick was as big as his mouth
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
You came into the club around midnight with a carton of tropicana o.j. & said you were starting a revolution.
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
Randomize
