operation harelip BJ is a go
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I puked in my fridge last night while I was trying to get water
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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