He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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