Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Randomize
