8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Best. Handjob. Ever.
I'm guessing Kelly is over?
Nope. Home alone.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I just had the stunning realization that I lost my virginity in a bunk bed.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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