i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
so he's a sleeptalker.
yeah??
"Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell" right in my ear. 2 am.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
Randomize
