I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
Randomize
