Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Uh oh. Middle aged belly dancers. And they just got out swords. Shit is about to get real.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Randomize
