Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
The walk of shame has never felt more glorious... I think it's the somberero
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
