Hey babe, chan wants you to stop texting her about the size of TJ's dick. please.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
Randomize