I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Somedays I wish I were a bird. Then people wouldn't be so grossed out when I vomit
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
