Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
I thought you should know that there is a scientific law stating that when there is booze, people talk about your dick.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
Randomize
