girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
