YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
Randomize