Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
