We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I don't really want to have sex with him, I'd just want him in a threesome. Does that make sense?
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
