I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I swear I have "I love assholes" written on my forehead with ink that only guys can see.
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
If we break up, I want weekend visitations with your penis.
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
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