No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
He ripped off my pantyhose and all I could think was, "oh no those were clinic-appropriate!" That's what I get for ditching a continuing education meeting to go hook up with my scuba instructor.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Randomize
