Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
i hate when i ask a girl what she's being for halloween and the first word isn't "slutty"
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
i think im the only person who makes thank you cards for their drug dealer
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Just killed a snake in my bed! And by killed I mean hit repeatedly with my fist. And by snake I mean a lump in the covers. And I pissed my pants.
Would you please stop exposing your tits on my couch?
Fuck you, my tits are fabulous
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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